Understanding Behavior in Young Children

Actions speak louder than words. The scowl on the barista’s face when you place your order overpowers the “Welcome to the Coffee Shop. How can I help you?” coming from his lips. Hopefully, life has taught us that we should not take these things personally. The barista’s behavior is an unspoken form of communication and there is an underlying cause.

Children also experience a myriad of feelings and desires that they do not always have the language for. These complex emotions lead to complex behaviors and “all behaviors have a purpose” (Alberto&Troutman, 2003). It’s important to know why the behavior is taking place so that you can respond appropriately. A great tool for insight into behavior can be found in understanding the four main functions of behavior. This is a “concept to identify why a person is continuing to engage in a behavior, believing that behavior typically serves a function or purpose for the individual.” https://insightstobehavior.com/blog/understand-functions-behavior/ . I came across this information, when looking into how to support my autistic students and found that it enhanced my positive discipline philosophy overall. This concept is not meant to simplify behavior, but it does provide insight and guidance to help understand why a child may be behaving in a certain manner.

Functions of Behavior

1. Escape: Behavior used get out of an undesired event.

2. Attention: Behavior used to receive attention (positive or negative).

3. Tangible: Behavior used to get access to a tangible object or activity.

4. Sensory: Behavior used self-soothe/provide relief from an undesired event.

   We should try not label behaviors as good or bad (I like the terms desirable undesirable or challenging).nor should we it take personally. Additionally, we should always remember that the behavior and the child are two separate entities. Although it can be difficult, looking at the behavior objectively and taking low-inference mental notes will help address the situation in a much more productive manner.

   For example, your toddler has a tantrum every time you leave the park.. The functions of their behavior are tangible- they want to gain access to more outdoor playtime and escape-they want to get out of going home. What can you do decrease the amount of times your child has tantrum?

   1. Give transitions cues. Let them know how much time they have left to play. Give 5 minute warnings. Even though young children do not understand this concept of time, they do understand that play time is coming to an end.

   2. Redirect: 15 to 30 minutes before leaving, redirect their play to something that is much more calming. Ex. I spy bird watching, breathing exercises, help clean up and pack up.You can also plan a desired activity for when your child gets home. “You get to help daddy cook, I know how much you love that!”

   3. Acceptance: It’s ok to teach your child to accept no as a final answer. On the way home, you can share what games you will play the next time you visit the park. Take this time to explain why it’s time to go. “Daddy has to get dinner ready and the dog is home alone.” This will also teach your child compassion and responsibility.

It’s important to remember that tantrums and toddlerhood are almost synonymous and your child is supposed to act like a child, not an adult. This is the stage in their lives when they are exploring their autonomy, which leads to somewhat of an internal and external power struggle for both parent and child. Understanding the functions of behavior and incorporating transition cues, established routines and clear communication are great ways to minimize challenging behaviors and equip your child with life-long self-regulation skills.